The Dating Saga of The Filipina Mistress

October 14, 2008 at 6:58 am (musings) (, , , , )

I spent a good majority of my growing-up days dating, or at least, wanting to date.

Growing up as the eldest among four siblings and brought up by academically-driven parents, I wasn’t allowed to be exposed to a lot of the teenage drama and the experiences that was expected for teenagers to go through at that time of their life. My parents weren’t really strict. I was allowed to go on school outings and supervised overnights unlike some of my less unfortunate friends. My parents were just somewhat conservative and goal-oriented, believing that boys would totally make me lose my focus from my education. I wasn’t really allowed to date and my parents wanted me to get a boyfriend only after I graduate from college. That didn’t stop me, of course, for I had my first date with one of my highschool classmates by the age of 15.

I got curious about boys at an early age and was envious of highschool classmates who find themselves in the throes of their first boyfriend-girlfriend relationships. When I left home to study college at the big city, I finally escaped the clutches of my parents’ supervision. As I went into my 2nd year of college, I watched my fellow classmates falling inlove with boys and venturing into territory that I’ve always wondered about. I was jealous. I kept thinking, What the hell do they have that they actually find themselves a man and I don’t? I am so much more prettier than them! So, when a guy I barely knew started showing some interest, I reeled him in with my feminine wiles and in less than a week, I finally got myself my very first boyfriend at the age of 17.

I was born a Roman Catholic and lived majority of my academic life in Catholic schools. Thus, it was a given that I imbibe the same Christian values that Christianity preached: masturbation is a sin, oral contraceptives are bad, and premarital sex is a no-no. Because I lived in an era that was slowly embracing the Western culture, expanding my horizons and gradually evolving me into the inquisitive open-minded woman that I now am, my religious values did not stop me from forsaking my morals and I lost my virginity at the age of 21.

I met my Mr. Almost in the form of Rockstar at the age of 21. After a particularly long and tumultuous relationship, I got engaged at the age of 24. Few months later, I got “dis-engaged.” I have been in and out of serious and not-so-serious relationships eversince as I continually search among the Mr. Wrongs for another Mr. Almost to become the one perfect Mr. Right. Because I’ve been to places and situations that most Filipina girls my age would probably have not gone, I have learned valuable dating lessons and experiences that opened my eyes about the opposite sex, which most Filipina women probably don’t know about. As such, I have developed more open-minded views and less-idealistic opinions than most of my friends, which prompted them to start calling me “The Master” or rather, the more politically-correct “The Mistress.” They have watched me flirt my way through certain situations, noted the succession of men who have gone in and out of my life, witnessed the hook-ups and break-ups, while I still maintained the same sunny disposition regarding love, continually believing that the right one for me is still somewhere out there, I just have to wait for him.

I’m not saying I’m a flirt. In fact, I’m rather a quiet and very reserved person.

I’m not saying that I’m promiscuous. In fact, I can still count the number of people I’ve slept with on my fingers.

And no guy will ever be worthy enough for me to stop being monogamous to my partner when I am in a serious relationship.

It’s just that I’m willing to immerse myself into the dating scene and check out what’s there. It’s just that I know I should not settle for what’s right there in front of me when I know I deserve so much more. It’s just that I know I’m meant for someone better who will show me true happiness and not just delude me into some fantasy of unrequited love or half-baked promises.

So, if I have to kiss a lot of frogs to find my Prince Charming, then I would.

Besides, who says dating isn’t fun anyway?


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